Challenges in childhood as a woman

As a girl or a woman I did not have too many challenges as gender bias was not an issue. This was a blessing. There were a few dos and don’ts for all the children in the house. My schooling gave me manifold opportunities to test my skills and talents as a leader, decision maker for myself and those I had to take responsibility for and living cohesively with people from all walks of life.

Educational Background

Schools believed in holistic development. So our curriculum included all that was needed to be a lady as in a finishing school. This was by the then existing society of that time. Exposure to theatre, western ballroom dancing, prim and proper behavior was a part of our education. But somewhere we missed out on the traditional Indian way of life. We did not know too much about our festivals, their significance and so on.

College education was from the then best college for arts, Nizam College which is a part of the Osmania University the alma mater of the former Nizams. My father and his siblings did their intermediate here before they pursued their chosen careers. This was one more reason for my joining this college which was carrying on the family tradition.

Transition and Experiences as a person/professional over the years

In the last of my teens, I got married into a family which was traditional in their way of life but their thinking was far ahead of their times. They were a generation ahead. That was for both my father-in-law’s and mother-in-law’s family. Also they were all staunch freedom fighters. Some went to jail and others worked with Mahatma Gandhi and wore khaddar till their very end. I am blessed as in the years to come I could pick on personalities I portrayed and wove stories around their lives.

As a student, trained for courses set out by Trinity College, London

These exams were a part of our academic curriculum. It fitted in with the objective of the school which believed in sending out assertive but polished ladies with all the graces and charm. These exams made us learn voice training, tone intonation and superior articulation which is an intrinsic part of effective communication. We participated in debates and declamations and group discussions at the state level among similar like-minded schools. They were fun. This led to the acquisition of a greater degree of self-confidence and the ability to think laterally.

Working with NGOs

Giving back to society has been a very enriching experience. I am blessed to get this opportunity through various NGO’s. Understanding others and empathizing with those who need you brings out the qualities of humility, kindness and a different kind of generosity. The hurt and difficulties of others opened my eyes to a world I could never imagine and how much we can give and how far from reality we, the privileged, live in. An example of this I would like to cite. Once, in Narayangaon, I was taking a training programme. At the end of the day I advised one girl who was very bright to continue with her post graduation. She turned round and said, “Madam, you don’t know how difficult it was for me to do my graduation. My father will not hear of post graduation. He feels that it is no use educating a girl as she will get married and go to her in-laws’ house.”

becoming an author

I was equipped to write well, thanks to my education. But my experiences helped me to pick on people I met who would make interesting reading with a bit of imagination and creativity. But what really helped me was doing a course in creative- writing. The shift was from “I” to you, they and us”. Writing for magazines and editing news -letters was totally different to short story writing. Writing was never planned but it happened and I am glad. People like me write because we enjoy writing.

What Keeps me Going?

I don’t know what continues to motivate me but I am glad as it has kept me mentally young and active. Perhaps it is the feeling that a journey needs to be continued as long as it is possible to do so. The innate creative instincts keep me going and lets me forget my own losses and adversities. Other than Darpan, 3 more books (Mani, Life for a life and Purity of Intent) are almost complete for publication. I hope to be remembered as a versatile writer rather than a champion of women’s journey of empowerment